Dear Mushka,

This morning I was reading Luke 8 - the Parable of the Seeds - and felt called to give encouragement from the Word today. This well-known story hit me in a different way as I was studying the passage. I thought about the gardener scattering seed to grow and how it landed all over the place - on the path, the rock, the thorns and the soil. It led me to thinking about how we as believers share the Word with others.

It made me want to be extra intentional about where I’m throwing my seeds and how I’m planting them. Am I content to occasionally toss out a Bible verse on a pretty Instagram post? Perhaps I’m just throwing seed on the path. We’re told that the devil takes the Word from hearts to prevent salvation, just like the birds came and ate the seeds that lay exposed.

Sometimes we share the Gospel, but don’t follow through with teaching about discipleship and sharing how truly good the Word is. People hear it, they love it and accept it with joy, but they don’t know what to do when they’re tested and so they fall away from the faith.

The parable goes on to say that sometimes the thorns capture us and we are swept away by the cares of the world. 

Then there is this small group where the seed actually lands on good soil - those people with “a noble and good heart who hear the Word, retain it and by persevering prepare a good crop.”

I’d love to just encourage us all today that as we’re scattering seeds (to our children, coworkers, neighbours), we’re intentional and prayerful! Not flippant or not even scattering. 

This all tied in with an old John Piper sermon about 1 John 2 where it talks about loving God and not loving the world. Timothy 2 tells us that people will be lovers of self and money, appearing to be religious, but not truly loving God. 

For those of you questioning your faith and if you’re truly saved, if you feel like your “seed” has landed in these other places that are not soil, press into God - draw near to the Lord (James 4:8) and He will draw near to you.

If you’re chasing the world (spouse, children, money, etc.), pause and dig into the Word. It’s active and living and will change us. Cry out to Jesus, ask Him to reveal the Father to you. Then we’ll be able to throw off the sin that entangles us.

If you’re a believer, but God feels far away right now or you feel you’re indifferent, do what you did when you wanted to become a Christian. The same spirit that saved you continues to sanctify. It’s only by His power that we’re grown - what a promise! Dive into His Word! And continue to remove your sins and idols. Pray for the Holy Spirit to change you! Ask Jesus to continue to reveal the Father to you; over and over again.

Praise Him for using us to scatter seeds and for growing the fruit within us. We can’t do any of it without His power and plan.

Every month or so we answer some of your questions! I don’t feel wise or deserving enough to share with you, but we’re honored to have you share these insights into our lives. And always remembering, we’re imperfect and completely in need of Jesus. 

This weekend, my Dad got remarried, 10 years after my mother’s death (you can watch the highlight called “My Mamma” here). The wedding was a little weird due to Covid, but the Lord truly brought beauty from ashes and we’re so grateful. The boys did great too.

Have we experienced any adoption hardships or unexpected difficulties?

The short answer is absolutely. You just can’t know until you’re in it. 

In fact, one moment happened at the wedding this weekend. As we were getting our boys ready, an older couple I grew up knowing saw us in the parking lot. This couple loudly asked “Are your boys real brothers?” (If you haven’t adopted, I know how easy these questions are to ask. It’s another example of not knowing until you know.) 

Family friends who heard answered “no” (meaning not biological brothers) and then corrected to “yes” (understanding that adoption makes them 100% “real” brothers).

Then the couple continued, asking where we “got them” and how long we’ve “had them” - a lot of questions that aren’t appropriate in a non-intimate conversation. This isn’t small talk - this is heavy and personal.

Please don’t ask these kinds of questions in front of children. It can be really harmful and shows a lack of understanding of the gospel of adoption! We are 100% God’s children through adoption. Praise God! 

Our kids have heard these questions often and it sparks good and necessary conversation, but it’s still hard!

I wish I’d said, “They are as much brothers as we are children of God.” I always have a great answer after the fact, but the Holy Spirit leads and we can rest in that. It’s never graceful or easy. We’re learning as we go.

The point is, this is something that was unexpectedly hard. It’s harder outside the home (for us) than inside. Inside our walls, conversations are beautiful and hearts are receptive. Outside our home, we have a lot to explain (especially as we adopted trans-racially). We get a lot of stares. It’s lonely, but God is always present.

Do We Do Bible Studies Together?

I get this question all the time. We don’t. 

I wonder where this pressure comes from. Why do we as women feel we should be sitting together with our husband every morning opening the same Bible passage together, reading the same devotion? There is nothing wrong with studying God’s Word together in a formal setting, but it isn’t mandated in Scripture. It also isn’t more holy than studying God’s Word apart from your spouse.

We study and read separately and freely share with one another. I don’t think we’ve ever done the same study. We learn and process differently. And truthfully I think we’re also too competitive for this - I think I’d turn it into a debate about who made the best point.

I’d encourage you to take the pressure off! If you want to do Bible studies together, bring the idea to your spouse and go for it, but it’s not a necessity.

Thoughts on Matthew 22 and No Marriage In Heaven?

Robert used to feel really sad at this concept. He says he had an underdeveloped theology of union with Christ. He felt like he’d be alone in Heaven. 

It’s really hard to understand what we’ll have in Christ when we’re face to face with Him! Everything you love about your spouse (being loved and seen and cared for) will be the ever present reality in Heaven. Marriage will find its fulfilment in Christ. We gain what an earthly marriage was created to point us towards. 

When Robert’s in his “abandonment issues” headspace, it feels scary and sad. He doesn’t want to do anything without me (other than Bible studies)!

But that’s when he’s thinking about Heaven as a loss to earthly things rather than a gain of Godly things. My encouragement would be looking toward that union with Christ and what oneness with Christ will mean in Heaven, and in that you’ll have such joy.

I think the concept goes into parenthood, too. The idea of not being a family unit with my children is weird. It will be SO MUCH better, whatever happens, but it’s hard to imagine. Our greatest longing will be satisfied in Christ, the righteous and pure versions of those longings. 

How to trust God in the waiting (for a spouse, children, job, health, etc.)?

Trusting God always comes back to knowing his attributes well enough, meditating on God’s character as the foundation and Him being bigger than our circumstances.

We have a product coming soon for this because it’s so important. I want God to become greater and greater in my own heart and mind. I want the things of Earth to grow dim in the light of His glory and grace. We study who He is in the Bible and see how He has shown His faithfulness time and time again. 

The Old Testament is full of examples of the Israelites marking God’s faithfulness (via an alter, feast, etc) with the purpose of even their children knowing and remembering who He is. We can claim His character in our own life. We’re grafted into Israel and all God’s promises find their yes and amen in Jesus. 

We have an all knowing and all powerful God. Tim Keller says that if we knew what God knew, we’d ask for exactly what He’s given us. 

Romans 8:28 reminds us that He’s going to work it all together for good. He can’t do anything else. The waiting is less about “having the wrong thing” and more about wondering “why it’s the right thing for this moment”.

What are we most excited about for the future of our family?

We’re praying about the idea of a fourth child. We’re often asked how we’ll know when our family is done growing. I think we just pray and ask for guidance. 

I feel like I’m at max capacity right now, and also that someone is missing. I’m not sure what will happen, but I know God will provide exactly what we need. 

I’m trying to just enjoy these moments. I”ve been thinking about what Phylicia Masonheimer says: “Don’t plan for seasons you aren’t in.”

How do we handle holiday decisions with our family (Like Santa and Halloween)?

We looked at examples around us, grateful for older and wiser friends! Santa felt like a “no” for both of us right away. We didn’t think he would draw our children’s (or our own) hearts to Jesus. We both remember feeling disappointed on Christmas morning because it was about gifts. Satan/sin is sneaky!

We aren’t "anti-Santa” - our boys know the story and not to ruin it for others, but we want the holiday to stay about Jesus without competition.

We’ve been on the same page about most holidays, which I’m grateful for. The Holy Spirit has led us similarly.

For Halloween, we celebrate the celebratable parts of it. We talk about the history of Halloween. We enjoy being with friends and candy and the fall weather. 

Not everyone agrees with us here and that’s okay! I think the Spirit leads us differently. We  talk about lightness and darkness and what the world may believe versus what Christians believe. We have a hands open approach. Every year I bring it to God and ask for guidance as I grow and mature.

We trust that He will redeem all the zillion ways we fail as parents. And we watch the reactions of our kids - they’re built differently and may need different responses to holidays. 

What was the most helpful to me from Robert as he helped me walk through the death of my mom?

I didn’t grieve, really, until this year. I shoved a lot down. I celebrated her Heavenly healing instead of also experiencing sadness. I’m working on it. What he did really well was help me grieve when I was ready - even 10 years later - to cry, talk it out, go to counselling, whatever I needed.

How do you walk through grief together?

Everyone grieves so differently. Communicate as best you can. Be compassionate, love each other, be attentive and listen. Don’t treat emotional wounds like they’re radically different to physical wounds. 

Robert would feed and bathe me if necessary for a physical wound or illness. For emotional wounds, be washed and fed by the Word - help one another experience God’s words if they can’t on their own due to sorrow. Pray scripture over them, read scripture to them, and play worshipful music. 

Thoughts on loving opposite-sex friends?

View the person as someone made in the image of God instead of means to an end. The more immature and younger you are, the more difficult this can be. With wisdom, this view can definitely be achieved.

Opposite-sex friends can also be brothers and sisters in Christ. Seeing people in that light really helps us love one another appropriately. Handle with Care by Lori Ferguson handles this issue really well.

We haven’t done one of these for a while, but we’re looking forward to catching up with some of your questions today! These are frequently asked questions by our followers on Instagram wanting to know more about our views on family, parenting and Christian marriage. Watch the Instagram highlight here.

How do you pray when you feel irritable towards your kids or spouse?

I pray honestly and ask the Holy Spirit for help. Another way is to change the prayer to focus on the issue at hand. It’s helpful to jot specific issues down on a post-it note to clear some brain space.

Remember that God doesn’t respond to us with irritation! Ask the Holy Spirit to fill you with His fruits (love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control) towards your kids and spouse.

Book recommendations for someone living out their last days of terminal cancer:

Tim Keller’s book on suffering: Walking with God through Pain and Suffering. I’d also recommend to immerse yourself in the Scripture; the Psalms especially.

What are your Enneagram Numbers?

I am a 9WI and Robert is a 6W7. We’ve found the enneagram to be a very helpful tool in our marriage and lives.

What is the best thing you did to prepare for marriage?

We didn’t prepare a lot! We were 21 and 22, right out of college. It’s proof of the Holy Spirit’s guidance that we made it. We did minimal premarital counselling; my mom died right after we married and we had that sudden trauma to deal with too. I don’t have a ton of answers, but I have hope! God doesn't leave you alone. 

“...He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.” - Phil 1:6

Together we’re growing in Him. We believe that people don’t fall out of love, they fall out of repentance. I was really bad at apologizing in our first years of marriage, something I’m working on! 

Books and counselling are great, but seeking first the Kingdom of God is most important. Walking faithfully with the Lord is the best way to prepare for marriage. Also, find someone who is passionate about knowing the Lord and serving Him. The rest will come.

How do you deal with a dry or hard season in marriage?

I’d say to remember that hard seasons are part of a long term marriage.  Dry and hard seasons come especially if you’re basing them on your feelings; you might have newborns and you’re exhausted or you’re just working through a really tough time. Just hang on!

Unmet expectations can cause a hard season. Take the opportunity to press into that hard season and ask if you’re being selfish or if there’s an unmet need you haven’t communicated to your spouse without inviting them in and asking for help. 

Remember that it’s the kindness of the Lord that leads to repentance and the kindness of a spouse that leads there too. Don't shame your spouse into it!

Our favorite verse or passage of Scripture:

The beauty of Scripture is that it’s one whole story that is interconnected. I love passages of Scripture that deal with placing your hope in God alone. I tend to go awry in that area - I put my hope in our marriage, how my home looks, how my children behave. I always need the reminder that peace and joy and hope will always come from God alone.

Robert is drawn to the prophets and Leviticus at the moment, to see God’s heart for justice and peace. Life ought not be the way it is now! We look toward the time when these things won’t exist, butGod does not like them now. 

What denomination of church do we belong to?

I grew up in the Church of Christ, Robert grew up Southern Baptist. Our current church is non-denomination. We love churches that love Jesus and one another and preach the Bible. 

How do you connect as a couple when the only time you have is after kid’s bedtime?

We’re home together most of the time so we connect all day long, but we are intentional about it after bedtime. We frequently just sit and talk together. If we watch a show, we watch ones that allow us to dialogue during it. 

Choose not to zone out in front of the TV together. Put your phones away. Ask each other questions. 

Book recommendations for people new to the Bible:

The Gospel of John

Women of the Word by Jen Wilkin - it’s an excellent read for men and women both.

Taking God at His Word by Kevin DeYoung. 

New believers who didn’t grow up in the church - grab a children’s Bible! 

What’s one ‘shoot for the stars’ goal for Dear Mushka?

I love to shoot for the stars, but I’m so content in Dear Mushka where it is. It doesn’t feel overwhelming and that’s a great goal for right now. We could always do more, but right now we’re serving the Lord faithfully and not destroying our family or other things in life. 

We want to continue serving you and pointing you to the Lord in different ways. There are so many options to deepen and broaden this community. The next thing I want to work on is more video content to share gospel encouragement and truth through each jewelry piece. Wearing jewelry is nice but talking about Jesus and sharing our stories that combine with His goodness is where it’s at! I want us to practice sharing the hope we have.

Do you think God punishes sin or just allows the natural consequences of it?

We’re keeping the answer focused on believers!

Our debts were paid on the cross, but He does discipline us which is meant to lead us towards repentance and sanctification. He disciplines with love, not wrath. There are also natural consequences of sin, but God uses those to bring us closer to Him.

How do you mindfully combat hurry in lives and marriage?

Robert and I have different levels of desired productivity and uncomfortable “hurry”. It’s good to acknowledge this in your marriage! Being hurried out the door is hard for me. We say no to a lot and prioritize time for what matters most.

Find a few passages of Scripture to help battle this if needed. Keep a Sabbath day in your home! Remember that God gives rest to His beloved. Our hustle is never going to accomplish it all.

How did you come to know the Lord and how did that lead you to marry each other?

We both grew up in Christian homes and met in a college ministry. Robert was actually saved in college after realizing that he knew all the right answers, but didn’t have a changed and repentant heart.

Tips on how to fight well:

Touching each other while fighting makes me uncomfortable, but some people love it! Remember the goal isn’t to win, it’s to reconcile. Robert can win any debate. He knows this and has to stay aware of our common goal. Be calm, patient, give one another time to process.

I take a while to process and speak with clarity and kindness. 

Fighting well is fighting on each other’s terms. Your call is to serve the Lord and love your spouse. We’re on each other’s team! The goal is to love one another as we love ourselves and glorify the Lord. I pray for this weekly and for a tongue that only speaks uplifting, encouraging words.

We’re both passionate, but God has grown us so much. 

Long necklaces may not always be the best everyday necklace for those of us with little ones, but I believe there’s still a place for a few in your jewelry collection. Think church, dates, social events, work, etc! If you don’t have little kids, the Magnify Necklace might indeed make a great everyday necklace for you! Made of woven glass beads, this sweet dainty necklace is meant to resemble a little magnifying glass.

Psalm 34:3 is the first verse I put to a little tune and taught to my son. "Oh, magnify the Lord with me, and let us exalt his name together!" Psalm 34:3

We’d sing the words before we’d read the Bible to signify that the Bible is a different and extra special book. 

To magnify means to make bigger! As John the Baptist said, “He must increase and I must decrease”. We are making God’s name bigger in our hearts, homes and tongues.

Wear the Magnify Necklace on a date night and remember the purpose of being together - we aren’t just enjoying one another - we’re on a mission! Magnifying God through this relationship. 

The Magnify Necklace is shaped like a whimsical magnifying glass, as she calls to mind Psalm 34:3-- which is a verse I think about in all relationships.

In our marriages, may we magnify God's name together. As friends, can we spur on our sisters to run this race with praise in every step? As mothers, may we lead our children in exalting God's name. 

Pair this with a breezy tank and shorts or a fancy dress, you're going to love it with either! Wear it to church and think about the body of Christ magnifying God together.

It’s a beautiful gift for a friend! Give it along with a note saying, “Sister, we’re more than just girl pals! I love magnifying God with you as we run this race together!”

And thank you, friends, for magnifying the Lord with me in this space.

We started paying attention to and educating ourselves about the issue of racism about four years ago. While we aren’t the best or only people to listen to, it isn’t a brand-new issue to us and we may be a step ahead of some of you who are also ready to listen and learn. Let’s talk about why racism should matter to everyone by answering some of the questions you’ve asked us. 

Q: “I care about abortion. We’re the body of Christ and we should care about different matters. Why is racism THAT big a deal? Why should this matter to all believers now?”

A: It should matter to all Americans, not just believers. The laws of our country are not equitable and they are not being administered justly. The color of your skin is the greatest predictor of your life outcome in this country. The administration of the law dictates this. That should bother all Americans! 

Christians, specifically, should care because the Lord cares about justice and those in need. He tells us constantly that we should care for the widow, the immigrant, the orphan, the sojourner and the oppressed. Throughout the Old Testament, the prophets rebuke the people of Israel for not caring for the oppressed. Using power to not care for others is an affront to the heart of God. This is not who He is. Christians should care because God cares.

Q: What if someone feels “called to” or passionate about abortion or another issue. We can’t do it all.

A: To note: We care deeply about abortion and adoption. All three of our boys are adopted and we pour heavily into this system. We are absolutely against abortion. While we are all called differently, injustice isn’t a quota system. It’s not like we need one injustice elective and then we’ve met our quota! Think about the Good Samaritan. He wasn’t travelling around the highways looking for destitute people to help or for someone with a specific kind of need. He saw a need and responded. Your neighbor is whoever is in front of you.

If abortion is what you feel drawn to, this topic should be especially important to you because racial injustice is a keystone societal issue. Abortion is an economic issue the vast majority of the time and almost exclusively an economic decision in lower income and minority communities. Without savings, support, a present father, a knowledge of the truth that her life matters, it’s hard for a mother to believe that her child’s life matters. Racial inequalities lead to abortions. If you care about abortions, care about this issue!

Q: Is talking about this making the problem worse? I feel like this is making a greater racial divide. 

A: People talk about being color blind or the idea of only one race, i.e. the human race. Remember that white or the majority culture in America has said that they want racial reconciliation. Many times, we confuse racial reconciliation with racial assimilation. We may actually want the differences to go away. We may actually want black people to be absorbed into white culture. We may want a multi-ethnic church that actually acts white, but has different skin tones inside. We want photo albums to be diverse, but not our culture. 

This is our problem to fix because we created it. We’ve never owned enslaved men and women or said the ‘n’ word, but generational responsibility is real. Our spiritual brothers and sisters are very guilty even if your biological family isn't. Hebrews gives an example of generational responsibility. We have to take responsibility for what happened years ago and how it is still affecting others. Whether we intended to or not, we’ve benefited from other people’s pain. Let’s do business with this. It was our collective and cultural cause that created it.  

We don’t think talking about abortion or whatever other issue makes it worse. We know that sin hides in the dark and is revealed in the light. The March for Life is a giant march. We see injustice and we act! We donate, vote, speak out. 

Examine this impulse to not want to address or talk about racism. Maybe we don’t want to give up our power? Or maybe we don’t actually see a problem and talking about it just feels like the problem. This is part of what people mean by white privilege. It’s a privilege to be able to ignore this issue if we want to. It’s prideful to tell someone they don’t have an actual problem or no right to be pained. That’s what we're communicating when we don't want to talk about this. We have 400+ years of oppression stories from Black men and women. Have you been listening? 

There is momentum here now. If we want change, which is step one, we have to care. Let’s jump on this train, combine our efforts and voices and act! Let’s press into this keystone issue and pray for and watch the trickle-down effect. Things won’t automatically be fixed, but talking and acting on this issue will play a significant role. That’s why the word systemic is used. 

This concept should be comfortable to us as Christians. We believe in sanctification, we know we aren’t perfect. We’re constantly asking to be searched and changed. Our hearts are so hard! Let's admit it and pray for change. Pray for the courage to act, vision where we’ve been uncaring and a heart like Christ’s. Just keep taking the next right step.

The Essential Necklace has a basic-shaped pendant to remind us to go back to the basics in our every day. May we put it on and do justice, love kindness, and walk humbly. It comes paired with the verse "...And what does the Lord require of you but to do justice, and to love kindness, and to walk humbly with your God?" from Micah 6:8.

As this verse is an important part of our faith, the hexagonal shape of the Essential Necklace is essential to elementary education and daily life! Let’s talk with our kids too about this. What does it mean to do justice, to love kindness, to walk humbly? Just as this shape is basic, this verse should be basic to our conversations with children, friends and all people.

Sharing Micah 6:8 is a beautiful way to honor our brothers and sisters and fight racism. God uses our specific giftings, community and voice so that we can share and grow and learn together. This verse presents an opportunity to ask what God says about justice and for us to ask how we can be equipped in Jesus’ name. 

Micah was a prophet in a time when Israel and Judah were split. There was a huge contrast between the rich and poor. The Israelites acted like they were obeying God, but God was saying, “You have missed it!” Micah prophesied and called King Hezekiah out. Ultimately the king repented and turned around the whole system. There was a revival and Jerusalem was saved! 

In Micah 6, the Israelites were asking God if they should give up more sacrifices to appease Him. That’s like us today saying, “We’ll go to church every time the doors are open. We’ll tithe more! We’ll start a Bible study!” Those things are good, but they can’t be what we skip to, jumping over God’s plan. Your daily Bible reading and prayer without these actions steps are missing God. 

Let this necklace encourage you to ask God, “How do You want me to do justice today?” Justice isn’t a theory, it’s an action step! 

Love, kindness, mercy, to walk humbly, hands open in repentance and acceptance of our humanity - Lord we need you! Move us forward. Let’s be changed by God and His Word! As a mother of three black sons, I’m so hopeful! Let’s be the church and do this together, in Jesus’ name.

To learn more, watch our daily Instagram stories where we share insights into this important conversation.

I came up with the Prayer Pages system after gathering wisdom from women far wiser than me over the years. It really works for me, and today I’d love to share with you exactly how I use these prayer pages during my daily morning quiet time. 

Watch my prayer pages video highlight on Instagram here!

I keep my prayer pages in my quiet time binder which contains a 3-ring notebook with tabs. (This is the exact binder I use). I find that using the binder keeps things easy and accessible. Instead of using lots of different journals, I keep everything in this notebook. For paper I use normal computer and notebook paper so I can print and add pages without difficulty. 

Inside the binder, I have five tabs:  

1. Prayer 
2. Bible reading notes 
3. Wonderful deeds of the Lord
4. Verses I am or have meditated on (Currently Psalm 73:23-26) 
5. and Goals.

Near my morning quiet time chair, I keep my binder, any books I’m working through, and verse memorisation tabs. When I’m able to sit down, I grab my binder and everything is ready!

This prayer system has been such a helpful tool for me and one I’ve used for years. I print these sheets (called Prayer Pages in my shop) once a quarter. There is a ‘Daily’ sheet and the one for six days of the week (Saturday/Sunday combined). The digital download comes with a few more pages and a lesson on prayer. 

I punch holes and then put them in my notebook. On the ‘Daily’ page I’ll write out what I pray for daily. Generally, I don’t write out long prayers (you could!). Mine are bullet points and/or verses. I usually include the Lord’s Prayer, praying for my boy’s salvation, my husband, a few friends I’ve committed to praying for, the Unreached People Group from Joshua Project , etc.

In the pages for the days of the week, I have other topics that I’ll cover at least once over the course of the week. This has removed any feelings of overwhelm and given me focus! I keep these in a big binder when the season (I go by the seasons of the year) is over. They’re highlighted and marked up with God’s answers. 

On Monday under ‘Dearest Ones’, I have my husband and kids with more specific prayers for each of them. This is a great place to hand any daily worries about parenting and marriage over to the Lord! 

Under ‘Family’, I have extended family members. You could take two days to pray over these if you wanted.

Under ‘Tuesday’, it’s ‘Myself’ and my ‘Goals’. I always want to be praying over my goals so they stay God-focused.This keeps me self-aware. It’s another great place to lay worries at the feet of Jesus. 

On ‘Wednesday’ is ‘Friends’ and the ‘Salvation’ of people I do life with. 

On Thursday, it’s ‘World’ and ‘Local’. I’m so grateful for this page in particular. I pray for our government, Compassion International, local church, leaders, etc. 

Friday is a free day. I always add Dear Mushka here, but this could be a place for marriage, adoption or a community group.

On Saturday and Sunday I pray for my family’s general sanctification, my prayer life, Bible reading and the fruits of the spirit. This could be a time to cover items that need more attention from the week.

Years ago, I was given a tip from a mentor to start praying aloud for five minutes every day. Every year, you add a minute. I’m up to 12 minutes now! I set an alarm and basically read off my lists. I read my bullet points, pray a Psalm or read prayers from a prayer book. Praying out loud makes it so much sweeter. I remember that I’m talking to someone and won’t get distracted! With my hands open, I pour out my heart and thoughts. 

At the end of the season, I highlight and make notes regarding God’s answers and then start new pages. 

The Kinship Necklace is a personal favorite, one of my most worn pieces. It comes with a beautiful verse from 1 John 3:1, “What kind of love the Father has given to us, that we should be called children of God; and so we are. The reason why the world does not know us is that it did not know him.”

The necklace was designed with three small beads made to look like little peas in a pod. Because God loved us and called us His children, we start to look more like Jesus and so look more like each other. Like peas in a pod, we are all daughters and sons of Him. We reflect His love to all who look at us. 

I feel this is such a sweet friendship or sister piece. The little pop of color will brighten up any outfit in a gentle and subtle way.  

Give this piece to a friend who could really use the reminder that she is a daughter of the Most High God. Maybe gifting this necklace is a way into a relationship with a new neighbor. The Kinship Necklace provides a little happy in times of uncertainty.  

As we look at what is happening in the world right now, when we feel like our foot is slipping, let’s read this passage and cling to the truth. God has made us his children. Remember precious words from the Bible - if He has given us His Son, will He not also give us all things? He is the Father who gives good gifts to His children. He satisfies the hungry soul. 

When we’re hurting, scared and lonely, we can rest in our daughtership. We will be okay no matter what happens if we stay safely nestled in Him.

The Stability necklace may appear like a simple everyday necklace, but it certainly makes a statement with its unique design. As you look at it, you’ll know a deeper story lies behind it. I’m praying it starts conversations and allows you an opportunity to share the gospel with others. 

This short necklace comes with a much requested verse from Isaiah 33:6, “And He will be the stability of your times, A wealth of salvation, wisdom and knowledge; The fear of the Lord is his treasure.”

The two pillars in the Stability necklace, a small one hanging from a larger pillar, serves as a reminder that we must cling to the Lord for our stability, salvation, wisdom and knowledge. 

Sometimes it feels as if the future is so uncertain.  We watch the news and wonder what is happening all over the world or in our own country. May we cling to this verse as we live in a broken world. This promise of God as our Stability was originally given to the Israelites, but it applies to us today. 

God, be our salvation and wisdom. We look only to You. Be our greatest treasure! 

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I recently chatted with Tara Leigh Cobble, founder of the Bible Recap and the D Group Ministry, about her perspective on singleness. You can watch her talk on the highlight here. As we learn about how God views singleness, let’s cheer one another on exactly where God has us, as sisters in Christ and Daughters of the King. 

Tara is single and an active member of the church. About a year and a half ago, she realized she was wrestling with the Lord against her singleness. God opened her eyes to the topic and she acknowledged that God was “doing” singleness in her life. Although she’s always wanted to be married, yielding to God’s plan brought unexpected freedom and joy. It was a relief! She still wants to be married, but she stopped filling all her prayer time with this topic, stopped wasting time on dates that don’t amount to anything. She gave this time back to the Kingdom.

Several well-meaning people said, “Now that you’ve laid this down, you’ll meet him!” Do you  recognize this combination lock? “When you get it together, you’ll be married.” This can also be in the form of “God’s working on you. When you get it together that’s when the Lord will bring Him along.” 

Marriage doesn’t come because we have our acts together! In fact, a spouse is often part of our refinement process. It was hurtful that others couldn't let her be in this space of content singleness. It’s true that we’re often uncomfortable with pain and we speak thoughtlessly.  Some seem to think a single person is unfinished. 

It can be challenging in a culture like the church where people may believe that marriage is the norm. In fact, singles should be embraced as “unbroken” and part of the norm. People often get married young in the church and think something is wrong if they’re not married by age 22. 

She wants single people to know there is nothing wrong with them that isn’t wrong with the rest of the world! We have a very good God with a very good plan. She has clung to this verse: Psalm 145:17, “The Lord is righteous in all His ways and kind in all His works.” Singleness can be His greatest kindness. Saying ‘yes’ to a prayer for a husband could be less kind than a ‘no’. Trust that the Lord is doing what is right and best for your joy and His glory. 

If you’re married, marriage is His greatest kindness to you even when it’s hard! Singleness and marriage are both gifts given by the Giver. Let the church recognize this! God may change those gifts for us, but we should live in His gift and kindness right now. 

It’s helpful when our brothers and sisters come alongside us instead of pushing against what God has given to singles in their lives. We aren’t promised tomorrow, much less a husband or even a good husband. Live in the gift! Seek the Lord and you’ll see that, married or single, He is where the joy is.